Well, technically you can, but you can’t spell the whole title of this blog entry without STD so I am counting that as a win. I am a terrible sleeper and my dog Tim usually walks around the bed throughout the night so that doesn’t help. I get anxious before I go to bed a lot and I also have this recurring dream that I drive to my old high school instead of taking the bus and I know that I have to get a parking permit, but I never really make it around to getting one so I am terrified that my car will get towed. I haven’t been in high school for 8 years, I always had a permit, and I am pretty sure you got a warning before getting towed so this dream s very irrational. And not even worth getting anxious over. The point of telling you about this dream was that I was nervous I was going to have it again last night. But instead I had a new one.
I somehow ended up bumpin’ uglies with my old co-worker Stamos. He’s younger than me so I mean old in the sense that we don’t work together anymore. And his real name is Kyle, but apparently when the ladies see him their panties just dissolve away, so they call him Stamos. I can’t confirm this legend, not even by my dream. See, the dream itself did not entail any of the dirty dirty. It was more like a movie when the people go into a room together and then they are magically in bed after the deed thinking, “What the hell did I just do”. That is apparently what I though in my dream, because I spend the rest of the dream asking Kyle Stamos Co-worker is he had ever been testing for any STDs. He said no, but I hounded him and eventually he confessed he did. He could have been lying though. Who knows. The moral of the story is, always wear protection even if you are just doing the horizontal shuffle in your dreams. And don’t let your panties dissolve ladies. Make sure they are cotton!